De Koning Kronikles

This is what several people have collected over time, very funny statements, as found in various public places.

Could not resist to withhold that from you.

In a Bangkok temple:

IT IS FORBIDDEN TO ENTER A WOMAN, EVEN A FOREIGNER, IF DRESSED AS A MAN.

Cocktaillounge, Phuket:

LADIES ARE REQUESTED NOT TO HAVE CHILDREN IN THE BAR.

Doctorsoffice, Bangkok:

SPECIALIST IN WOMEN AND OTHER DISEASES.

Drycleaners, Bangkok:

DROP YOUR TROUSERS HERE FOR THE BEST RESULTS.

In a Chiang Mai restaurant:

CUSTOMERS WHO FIND OUR WAITRESSES RUDE OUGHT TO SEE THE MANAGER.

On the main road to Bangkok, leaving Petchaburi.

TAKE NOTICE: WHEN THIS SIGN IS UNDER WATER, THIS ROAD IS IMPASSABLE.

On a poster in Hua Hin:

ARE YOU AN ADULT THAT CANNOT READ? IF SO WE CAN HELP.

In a City restaurant:

OPEN SEVEN DAYS A WEEK AND WEEKENDS.Ina cemetery Pattaya:

PERSONS ARE PROHIBITED FROM PICKING FLOWERS FROM ANY BUT THEIR OWN GRAVES .

Pranburi’s hotel rules and regulations:

GUESTS ARE REQUESTED NOT TO SMOKE OR DO OTHER DISGUSTING BEHAVIOURS IN BED.

On the menu of a Bangkok restaurant:

OUR WINES LEAVE YOU NOTHING TO HOPE FOR.

In a Go Go bar:

SPECIAL COCKTAILS FOR THE LADIES WITH NUTS.

Hotel, Hilton:

THE FLATTENING OF UNDERWEAR WITH PLEASURE IS THE JOB OF THE CHAMBERMAID.

Hotel, Hilton:

YOU ARE INVITED TO TAKE ADVANTAGE OF THE CHAMBERMAID.

In the lobby of a Pattaya hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery:

YOU ARE WELCOME TO VISIT THE CEMETERY WHERE FAMOUS RUSSIAN AND SOVIET COMPOSERS, ARTISTS AND WRITERS ARE BURIED DAILY EXCEPT THURSDAY..

A sign posted in Korat:

IT IS STRICTLY FORBIDDEN ON OUR BLACK FOREST CAMPING SITE THAT PEOPLE OF DIFFERENT SEX, FOR INSTANCE, MEN AND WOMEN, LIVE TOGETHER IN ONE TENT UNLESS THEY ARE MARRIED WITH EACH OTHER FOR THIS PURPOSE.

Hotel, Koh Samui:

BECAUSE OF THE IMPROPRIETY OF ENTERTAINING GUESTS OF THE OPPOSITE SEX IN THE BEDROOM, IT IS SUGGESTED THAT THE LOBBY BE USED FOR THIS PURPOSE.

Advertisement for donkey rides,

WOULD YOU LIKE TO RIDE ON YOUR OWN ASS?

Airline ticket office, Ubon Ratchatani:

WE TAKE YOUR BAGS AND SEND THEM IN ALL DIRECTIONS.

A laundry service in Pattaya:

LADIES, LEAVE YOUR CLOTHES HERE AND SPEND THE AFTERNOON HAVING A GOOD TIME